Musings on My Muse and His Bloodbrother

Where Loki goes, Odin follows, usually at a sedate pace, sometimes just to check things out because Loki does some interesting things when he’s left to his own devices. Where Odin goes, Loki stalks by his side, because Odin doesn’t usually mix it up unless it’s important. I experience Them as Loki fiercely devoted to Odin, though I think Odin is every bit as devoted to Loki-He just doesn’t wear it on his sleeve the way Loki does.

I’m convinced when working with One we usually, at least peripherally, will experience the Other. Sometimes Their energies mix together and blend and are a beautiful new thing. Sometimes working with Loki I will suddenly realize perhaps I’m talking to Odin instead, though rarely vice versa.

They’re tricky, Those Two.

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Odin’s Gift

Loki’s strawberry blond hair winked in the winter sunlight, large fluffy snowflakes catching in the strands. He hunched his lanky frame behind the smooth silver bark of the tree grinning while he molded the snowball carefully. Today was his birthday and Odin had a surprise for him, but he had one for Odin too. The snowball had to be to exact proportions. He didn’t like it when they were lumpy or oblong. They had to be perfect. His hands numbed while he waited, weapon in hand, so he gently sat the snowball aside gathering the folds of his light cloak in his hands, pulling them tight to his body. He played with his breath, watching the white cloud mist in the afternoon sunlight.

He shivered. His blue cloak was a pleasure to look at, it reminded him of his best friend’s eyes, but wasn’t doing much to keep out the weather. His mother preferred warmer climates and had never quite figured out what winter clothing should be. She simply stayed by the fire. They were only here, far in the north, because his father insisted it was safer right now, though from what Loki had not been able to figure out. He smiled when he heard boots crunching in the newly fallen snow. He’d been waiting here for over an hour so there would be no footprints. He held his breath to keep from laughing out loud. As quietly as a fairy dancing on a frosted leaf he picked up his snow ball and tensed his muscles, waiting. Waiting.

When the familiar tall form of his friend passed his hideaway, lost in contemplation as was usual for him, he almost didn’t strike. The snowflakes stuck in Odin’s black hair, shiny strands blending in with the cloak he was wearing, his strong form cutting an unhurried path through the trees, and Loki was frozen, like the rivers, like the air. Then a small smirk tugged at his lips and he let fly the perfect, round ball with a snicker. His friend heard that giggle, but when he turned and ducked he took the missile directly in the face.

“Ha! Predictable old man!” Loki hooted out another laugh, dancing in place to keep warm now that surprise wasn’t necessary. Odin growled, wiping the melting snow from his face, but it was with fond exasperation and not true anger that he pounced on his younger friend. They wrestled for a few moments, Loki not truly trying to get away, until they tumbled together in a heap on the ground. A handful of snow found its way under Loki’s shirt and he yelped and giggled while he struck out with an elbow that caught Odin in the stomach. Gasping and laughing the taller teen flopped onto his back and together they watched the sunlight dance between the snowflakes.

“I got you.”

“Brat,” Odin laughed.

“But I did.”

“Yes.” Odin’s smile was wide and for a moment Loki was lost in it, lost flying in his sky eyes, lost in the happiness of being near his friend. Then he shivered, and his body reminded him that he was lying on the icy ground.  Odin frowned, and squinted at his friend.

“I thought you had changed your mind about going with me. I didn’t think it was like you to miss a chance to hear the poets. You can’t go with me like that,” he frowned tugging on Loki’s cloak. “Our journey will take several hours.”

“Like what?” Loki asked sitting up. He felt offended, but he wasn’t quite sure why. He pushed a lock of his hair behind his ear, hands shaking with the cold and something else. He didn’t like it when he disappointed Odin, but he wasn’t even sure what he’d done.

Odin sighed and stood. He knew that look. Loki was gearing up to be obstinate. “It wasn’t a reprimand. I am thinking of your wellbeing. Take this,” he said pulling off his cloak, tossing in onto Loki’s head. He laughed and pulled it off, hair sticking out like he’d been standing in a strong wind.

“No,” he said trying to hand it back, but Odin winked and stepped away, hands behind his back.

“Why?”

“It’s yours.”

“So are you. You are my friend.” Loki looked on with interest as Odin’s cheeks tinted redder than they had been with the cold as he turned on his heel to cut a path through the forest.

“Oh, well…Thank you.” Loki said, rushing to keep up, but he still didn’t put the cloak around his shoulders. Odin’s long legs ate up the distance and Loki had a moment of envy. He’d grown recently, but Odin was still taller. He was beginning to suspect he’d always be shorter. Watching Odin, Loki felt …warm, inside, deep in his gut, as he clutched the soft cloth close.

“I have another. We’ll go back to camp,” Odin said dismissively, but Loki stopped with a grunt, tugging on Odin’s black shirt, tangling his fingers tight into the material to stop him.

“No, if I do my Mother will make me stay.” Odin raised his eyebrows and Loki shrugged with a slow smile. It wasn’t the first time he’d run off when he wasn’t supposed to in order to spend an evening at Odin’s side.

“Here,” the taller youth said crowding into Loki’s space, pulling the cloak from his chilled fingers. He whirled the cloak around, placing it back onto his own shoulders while Loki looked on impressed by his friend’s grace. Odin held out a strong arm and when Loki hesitated, stepped into the smaller man draping a careful arm around his shoulders. “Walk next to me then. It’s big enough for two.”

Loki wasn’t sure what to do with himself as they started to walk. Warmth radiated between their moving bodies and Odin seemed to know where they were going, like he always seemed to-even when he did not-and Loki relaxed, wrapping his own arm around Odin’s waist, wiggling his fingers between his wide belt and the shirt so they could stay warm. Odin smelled of campfire and pipe smoke and pine. As they walked Odin’s black hair, long enough to brush Loki’s cheek, fluttered and tickled him until he laughed. With an exaggerated scowl Odin stopped to pull it out of the way tying it with a leather thong at his neck. Loki was more in the way than not, but he didn’t want to move away from Odin’s heat, so he stood there, pressed to his side.

“Thank you,” he said quietly while his friend readjusted his cloak around them. Odin nodded and smiled that small, mysterious smile he got sometimes, the one that made his face softer, and his eyes less serious.

“Hospitality is a kindness for all involved,” he replied gruffly as they walked through the forest onto a well-used path. He looked away from Loki, gazing into the distance. Loki leaned around Odin to look that direction too, but didn’t see anything interesting. He shrugged and leaned into the curl of his friend’s arm, trusting him to take them where they should be.

Old School Revival

Is it just me, or does it seem that the Gods are trying very hard to gather close a new crop of Preist/esses at this moment? It seems like many pantheons are very close to having a living, breathing, and most of all dynamic following once again. The internet has been gifting me with interesting websites lately. I’ve seen godspouses of Hades and Lugh and of course there is the spate of Kemetics that are easily found, along with the normal run of blogs I sometimes peek at that involve the Norse pantheon.

I am struck with excitement about this today, like it means something special, and I’m not sure why.

 

Family of Choice or The Blood Brothers

“Do you remember, Odin, when in bygone days
we mixed our blood together?
You said you would never drink ale
unless it were brought to both of us.”
-Larrington (1998:86) courtesy of Wikkipedia

Once upon a time, Odin saw Loki in all of His shinning Glory and The Allfather (who probably wasn’t referred to as such yet because Loki came on scene before His wives) decided He needed some of That in His predictable life. We don’t have a reliable timeline, as far as I know, for when Odin lost his eye to gain His all seeingness-and honestly time is a finicky, fickle Bitch anyway-however, I believe it goes something like this: “Wow, I’d like to know everything.” Odin finds a way to know everything (the whole creepy eye loss thing). Knowing everything is boring, and even The Allfather can’t accurately predict what Loki Himself will do next, and what a great relief for Odin some freakin’ spontaneity is.

So, Odin sets out to woo Loki, or in fact, prove that He is worth Loki’s time. He does this not with gifts or promises of power or anything mundane. Odin woos Loki with His solidness and rationality and His great desire to join the divine spark of Leadership and War with Loki’s own spark, and maybe He just Wanted Loki too in a very Personal way. And Loki likes being wanted for Himself. The essence of Himself is very attractive (must we mitigate Love and Longing to speak of the Divine? It would be limiting to do so and no represent reality very well.) Odin has Passion for Loki, and Loki returns the sentiment.

Define Passion:

Sexual passion is about satisfying both mental desires, deep and often unknown until they are painstakingly and sometimes painfully uncovered, while having leg shaking, mind numbing, breath stealing, pleasure zap through your naughty bits. Mental passion is about having someone satisfy and fulfill a need  located primarily in the mind or spirit with joy. For instance, mental passion can be satisfied with a great conversation, someone who enjoys the same hobbies, someone who makes your brain twitch with their wit and spark of personality. One can exist without the other, but the most holistic passion is a duality of both, which the passion for Loki truly was for Odin.

Because Odin has passion for Loki He makes Him the offer (something like this), “Please, join My bloodline. Be my blood brother. I choose you as a member of my family. I will protect you as my own, love you as my own, and keep you always in my thoughts as my own, and I trust you shall do the same.”

And Sweet Wild Loki, in his youthful exuberance, for He and the world we know is was still young, agreed and threw Himself into the offered Kinship. Through the blood bond he drew His Loyalty to Odin. And most of us know Loki will Love even until and through Hate- until He is loved again with His Mortals- so this is no small agreement for Himself. Loki loving Odin was for keeps.

Loki keeps His word.

After their union, Odin and Loki do much scheming for the good of a/All behind closed doors. Loki sweeps away stagnation and the ordinary and together they plan. Odin respects and considers every silvered word dripping from Loki’s tongue, even if in the end He makes a different decision than Loki would prefer. Odin is good with the long game.

In Their love and bond I see the beauty of family of choice. I see the thrill of building a life you truly want to live, but using a support more solid than even a marriage. They joined blood. They chose to become rooted family, or a family linked by something more tolerant and less tenuous than a marriage bond. Due to their joining their energy literally grows in each other and with one another, a mimic of the Great World Tree extending out and into one another. Their blood is the nourishing Water from The Well for one another. Their souls are enmeshed completely by their purposeful act and Will. All of Their wives and loves connecting to One of Them invariably connects in some small way to the energy of the Other.

When I mediate I light a candle for Odin and his Blood Brother Loki. I Hail Them and the energy of Their Bond and respect Their family of choice and Their Love.

In many ways, a family of choice can be more meaningful and tighter knit than birth families. I’m not saying this in any way to diminish our ties to our ancestors, but families can splinter from lack of compatibility and care. When people choose family that choice is based on need and compatibility and a joyful reflection and balance of our best and worst traits. More energy goes into maintaining the bond and therefore the relationship. The fires of passion and friendship forge something entirely unique from that of ancestry. Ancestry is a tide and choice is a tidal wave.

Notes: It is part of my UPG that Loki and Odin do get down from time to time with one another. They’re not human and I believe any version of human morality restricting sexuality to hetero- or homo- or other is kind of a null value with Them.